Today I thought I’d write about those that have had a really difficult time during the recent volcanic eruptions in Bali, disrupting their travel plans. Those who couldn’t get here and those who are stranded in Bali draining every cent that would have been put towards future holidays.
As a psychiatrist, I see first hand the emotional and medical consequences of banking up a sleep debt, rest debt and ‘catch up with family and friends debt’ all the time. So many of us, including me, continue to put off what is immediately beneficial and rewarding. How many times have we thought about how much we enjoy having a coffee with a friend, only to lament about how long it has been between drinks? Finding time for a coffee and a catch us seems insurmountable yet the benefits last longer than the coffee does. Likewise, planning a break from relenting commitments, daily schedules, obligations and structure can often be the only way we cope with it all.
I think about how exhausted I was before heading to Bali. I didn’t even realise until I almost collapsed into the lounge by the pool and couldn’t move. Daily morning yoga was a total struggle; I hadn’t practiced yoga for over 2 years and my busy mind made me lose my balance way before my muscles did. But after about 3 days, I was, surprising to me, completely relaxed. After 5 days, one of the guests, soon to become a friend alerted me to the cancellation of flights and the volcanic disruption occurring all around me. Because, from the resorts in Bali, there is no evidence at all there is an ashcloud. From that morning on as speculation grew we all succumbed to the lack of daily updates, uncertainty and the very real situation that we wouldn’t be returning home on time.
But what about if it was a week before? What if I hadn’t made it to the yoga mat?
I think if I hadn’t made it to my holiday in the first place I would have needed to have thought of a pretty good plan B by now. I admit I have fallen into the trap of ‘it’ll be OK, just get through this week, this financial quarter, this year’, wishing days away waiting for a break. When we do this we take a toll on our own health, often silent, succumbing to more viral infections, or mildly raised blood pressure, chronic fatigue, and so on. We somehow justify that things will all rectify themselves, once we get on that holiday.
In this current situation, many people just like me have banked up the same amount of debt but unlike me just didn’t get to Bali, or did, but are trying to rationalise the situation by eating into funds for the next holiday. If you are one of these people I am sure you have struggled with the uncertainty, the hope you’ll depart then the disappointment when you don’t and by now are absolutely fed up.
Faced with the certainty of a volcanic eruption, completely at the hands of mother nature, it is time to take charge of some certainty over your predicament. Because, if you were operating on limited reserves like me up until now, it’s time to take back some control.
Some things to try;
- Sit down with your family and work out what it was that you wanted from the holiday in the first place. ‘Chill out’ I hear you say. Reflect on what it is in your daily life that doesn’t allow you to ‘chill out’. Write it down and save for later. Now is not the time to try and make the most of things. You need a break right now.
- Negotiate your way into a new holiday, whether it be shorter or to a different destination. I’m not saying to put yourselves in debt, but desperate times call for desperate measures, and I know the airlines are very happy to offload passengers to another destination to get them off the queue. It may be shorter, and it won’t be Bali, but it will be something.
- If you now have unexpected days at home, use them wisely. Don’t try and overload them but instead spend them doing things you always put off.
- If you are on an extended stay in Bali, live in the moment. None of us know what next year will bring. There is no reason to believe that this delay due to no fault of your own, means you will never holiday again.
Remember your thinking is probably clouded by your current predicament. It won’t feel like this once you do come back from your holiday or get home.
The one thing I have seen most in medicine is that none of us know our fate and despite our best plans, sometimes things just happen. As humans we don’t think about this that often, until the inevitable happens. As a word of advice, it might be best to avoid call centres as much as you can. Lip service right now, when you are as frazzled as I am, is not going to help. The operators have to behave a certain way, and we all know, if they just said they didn’t know we would all be happy. I understand that the most frustrating thing right now is not feeling heard or understood.
Take care and find your yoga mat, it is waiting for you.
Dr Helen Schultz is a consultant psychiatrist currently stranded in Bali. She has had the most amazing time and met some fantastic people but it is time to go home.